The tigers Wedding

A tiger was getting married and all animals attended the wedding. Every animal stood
 at a distance and wished the tiger.

A cat came and climbed to the stage and danced, then extended his hand to wish the tiger.
The tiger roared in rage and said "how dare you come on the stage? Even the panther is maintaining its distance and yet you climbed the stage."

The cat replied and after listening to what the cat said, the tiger fainted. What do you think the cat said to the tiger?
Any guess?

a

The cat said, "I was also a tiger before I got married".

The Cat and Mouse Saga !

A cat and a mouse dies, goes to heaven.

God to mouse - How do you like heaven? 

Mouse - Heaven is beautiful and so much bigger than I imagined. I would like some roller skates to get around.

God - granted !

God to cat - How do you like heaven?

Cat - I always knew heaven is an amazing place. But now that I am here, I can see it is even better than I imagined. I saw meals on wheels!

Fuck a Duck !!

A woman brought a very limp duck into a veterinary surgeon. As she laid her pet on the table, the vet pulled out his stethoscope and listened to the bird's chest.

After a moment or two, the vet shook his head and sadly said, "I'm sorry, your duck, Cuddles, has passed away."

The distressed woman wailed, "Are you sure?" "Yes, I am sure. Your duck is dead," replied the vet..

"How can you be so sure?" she protested. "I mean you haven't done any testing on him or anything. He might just be in a coma or something."

The vet rolled his eyes, turned around and left the room. He returned a few minutes later with a Labrador Retriever.

As the duck's owner looked on in amazement, the dog stood on his hind legs, put his front paws on the examination table and sniffed the duck from top to bottom. He then looked up at the vet with sad eyes and shook his head.

The vet patted the dog on the head and took it out of the room. A few minutes later he returned with a cat.

The cat jumped on the table and also delicately sniffed the bird from head to foot. The cat sat back on its haunches, shook its head, meowed softly and strolled out of the room. 

The vet looked at the woman and said, "I'm sorry, but as I said, this is most definitely, 100% certifiably, a dead duck."

The vet turned to his computer terminal, hit a few keys and produced a bill, which he handed to the woman.. The duck's owner, still in shock, took the bill. 

"£150!"she cried, £150 just to tell me my duck is dead!"

The vet shrugged, "I'm sorry. If you had just taken my word for it, the bill would have been £20, but with the Lab Report and the Cat Scan, it's now £150."