Dave works hard at the plant, puts in a lot of overtime, and then spends most evenings bowling, playing basketball or working out at the gym. His wife, Mary, thinks he is pushing himself too hard, so, for his birthday, she takes him to a local strip club.
The doorman at the club greets them and says, "Hey, Dave, how ya doing?"
Mary is puzzled and asks if he's been to this club before.
"Oh no," says Dave. "He works out at the gym with me."
When they are seated, a waitress asks Dave if he'd like his usual Budweiser.
Mary is now becoming uncomfortable and says, "You must come here a lot for that woman to know you drink Budweiser."
"No, honey, she's in the Ladies Bowling League. We share lanes with them."
A stripper comes over to their table and throws her arms around Dave. "Hi Davey," she says, "Want your usual table dance?"
Mary, now furious, grabs her purse and storms out of the club.
Dave follows and spots his wife getting into a cab. Before Mary can slam the door, Dave jumps in beside her. Right away she starts screaming at him.
The cabby turns his head and says, "Looks like you picked up a real bitch tonight, Dave."
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And One from the Royal Palace in Buckingham !
Camilla bought new shoes for her wedding. During the big day they became increasingly tighter as the day went on.
That night, she flopped on the bed and said,"Charles,please remove my shoes,my feet are killing me!" He attacked her right shoe with vigour,but it would not budge.
"Harder!" yelled Camilla, "Harder"."I'm trying, But it's just so bloody tight!" "Come on! Give it all you've got!"Finally, when it released, Charles let out a big groan and Camilla exclaimed, "There! Oh, God, that feels so good!"
In their bedroom next door, the Queen said to Prince Phillip,"See! I told you with a face like that, she had to be a virgin!" Meanwhile, as Charles tried to remove her left shoe, he cried, "Oh, God, darling! This one's even tighter!"
At which Prince Phillip said to the Queen, "That's my boy! He served in the Navy: Once a Rear Admiral, always a Rear Admiral!"
That night, she flopped on the bed and said,"Charles,please remove my shoes,my feet are killing me!" He attacked her right shoe with vigour,but it would not budge.
"Harder!" yelled Camilla, "Harder"."I'm trying, But it's just so bloody tight!" "Come on! Give it all you've got!"Finally, when it released, Charles let out a big groan and Camilla exclaimed, "There! Oh, God, that feels so good!"
In their bedroom next door, the Queen said to Prince Phillip,"See! I told you with a face like that, she had to be a virgin!" Meanwhile, as Charles tried to remove her left shoe, he cried, "Oh, God, darling! This one's even tighter!"
At which Prince Phillip said to the Queen, "That's my boy! He served in the Navy: Once a Rear Admiral, always a Rear Admiral!"
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