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Showing posts with label spelling. Show all posts
Showing posts with label spelling. Show all posts

Thursday, August 1, 2013

Hotel Brochure from Beijing



This Brochure is a gem!

A friend went to Beijing recently and was given this brochure by the hotel. It is precious. She is keeping it and reading it whenever she feels depressed. Obviously, it has been translated directly, word for word from Mandarin to English.


Getting There:
Our representative will make you wait at the airport.. The bus to the hotel runs along the lake shore. Soon you will feel pleasure in passing water. You will know that you are getting near the hotel, because you will go round the bend. The manager will await you in the entrance hall. He always tries to have intercourse with all new guests.




The hotel:
This is a family hotel, so children are very welcome. We of course are always pleased to accept adultery. Highly skilled nurses are available in the evenings to put down your children. Guests are invited to conjugate in the bar and expose themselves to others. But please note that ladies are not allowed to have babies in the bar. We organize social games, so no guest is ever left alone to play with them self.

The Restaurant:
Our menus have been carefully chosen to be ordinary and unexciting. At dinner, our quartet will circulate from table to table, and fiddle with you.



Your Room:
Every room has excellent facilities for your private parts. In winter, every room is on heat. Each room has a balcony offering views of outstanding obscenity! . You will not be disturbed by traffic noise, since the road between the hotel and the lake is used only by pederasts.

Bed
Your bed has been made in accordance with local tradition. If you have any other ideas please ring for the chambermaid. Please take advantage of her. She will be very pleased to squash your shirts, blouses and underwear. If asked, she will also squeeze your trousers.




Above all:
When you leave us at the end of your holiday, you will have no hope. You will struggle to forget it."

Wednesday, June 19, 2013

When Stickers are Stuck Wrong !


A good message for the Gay right activists !! I tell ya - treat them right ! They are the same flesh and bone as you and I are.



Porn Movie for kids?



I knew this Elmo guy was not right !!



Winnie the Pooh - OK, I did not see it coming this soon when I mentioned Gay's to be treated equally !!



Attention all you Ass Holes !!!!! I will give a few free of charge to you !!



Well, I would be a happier person Today if you did, you wild thing !!



Yes, your ...................   So what ? Need Viagra ?



Ya - this is the opposite of Music to the Ear I guess !



The "yet to evolve" bloody Koreans in the north apparently are doing this - Fuck them all Kim Ill Ping Pong !



Naa - I still prefer some Android games !! No time to coo coo around someones fantasy land !



Lost for words on below - LOL !! New meaning to fucking a doughnut !



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