Jokes, Cartoons and Funny Stories. The Funniest stories to Laugh on and pass on... (Warning - may contain adult content)
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Monday, October 15, 2018
Bill Gates resign as Microsoft CEO
Bill Gates has resigned as the 'Chairman of Microsoft' after receiving a letter from kuppuswamy. He was bright enough to handover the operations to an Indian, Satya Nadella
It reads:
Saar,
I have some questions for you.... Please yanswer them:
Nambar wan) The keyboard alphabets are not in order, when will you launch the correct version?
Nambar too) There is yeh 'Start' button... but no 'Stop' button... where it is?
Nambar tree) I have already learned Microsoft Word, when are you " laanching" Microsoft Sentence?
Nambar for) There is yeh Recycle bin... but...there is nobody coming to collect that bin. Why???
Your name is Bill... But in India they orr selling computers without Bill... Why???
Yand finally yeh personal question:
Your surname is Gates... But you are selling Windows... Why saar why??
Tuesday, October 2, 2018
Tom's Scrotum
The story of the year doesn't give the proper praise and credit for this painful but understandable story told by a loving wife....... Share with your friends and family to show gratitude to all those wonderful wives !
The pastor asked if anyone in the congregation would like to express praise for answered prayers.
Suzie Smith stood and walked to the podium. She said, "I have a praise".
Two months ago, my husband, Tom, had a terrible bicycle wreck and his scrotum was completely crushed. The pain was excruciating and the doctors didn't know if they could help him."
You could hear a muffled gasp from the men in the congregation as they imagined the pain that poor Tom must have experienced. "Tom was unable to hold me or the children," she went on, "and every move caused him terrible pain"
We prayed as the doctors performed a delicate operation, and it turned out they were able to piece together the crushed remnants of Tom's scrotum, and wrap wire around it to hold it in place."
Again, the men in the congregation cringed and squirmed uncomfortably as they imagined the horrible surgery performed on Tom.
"Now," she announced in a quivering voice, "thank the Lord, Tom is out of the hospital and the doctors say that with time, his scrotum should recover completely."
All the men sighed with unified relief. The pastor rose and tentatively asked if anyone else had something to say.
A man stood up and walked slowly to the podium.
He said, "I'm Tom Smith." The entire congregation held its breath.
"I just want to tell my wife the word is sternum."
That's the Sternum for your Info.. :D :D :D
Thursday, August 23, 2018
Short Dirty Jokes !
Six Laughs to Share with your friends !!
Number 1:
A man was so jealous of his newly born baby that he put poison on the wife's nipples while she was asleep. The next day their driver died of poisoning. ****
π
Number 2:
A man is dying of cancer, but keeps telling people he is dying of AIDS. His son asked his Dad why. He answered, "so that when I am dead, no one will sleep with your mum." ****
π
Number 3:
A lady lost three panties in her house and blamed her maid in front of the husband. Maid said "sir. you are my witness you know I never wear panties!"
****
π©
Number 4:
Couple is having a quickie and their 6 year old catches them. "What are you doing?" Asks the son.
Father: "I’m putting petrol in your Mom."
****
π΅πΊ
Number 5:
A man went to the pub with his wife.
When he left for the counter to buy drinks a prostitute approached his wife & whispered, "You must DEMAND cash before sex, I know him he doesn't pay. ****
πΌπ±
Number 6:
An 8 year old boy is accused of rape. In court his lady lawyer holds his dick out as evidence saying, "Your Honour see this, can he rape with this tiny tot?
"The boy whispers, "Don't shake it, we'll lose the case!" ****
π
Now that you've smiled, don't be stingy with the smiles, share them With 6 friends for 6 Laugh
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