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Showing posts with label teacher. Show all posts
Showing posts with label teacher. Show all posts

Wednesday, April 17, 2019

I am Coming too !


Share your laughter with your friends.... Let's share on social media friends.. 



Little Musa comes to school with a black eye regularly. The teacher notices this and thinks of having a chat with little Musa. 


TEACHER: What's wrong?

MUSA : Our house is very small.

MUSA: My mum, my dad and I, we all sleep on the same bed. Every night my dad asks, Musa r u sleeping?' Then I say 'No' and then he slaps my face and gives me a Black eye"


Teacher: Tonight when ur dad asks again, keep dead quiet. don't answer. The following morning Musa comes back with a severe black eye again.

Teacher: My goodness why the black eye again?

Musa : Dad asked me again, Musa are you sleeping? I shut up and kept dead still. Then my dad and my mom started moving, u know, at the same time Mum was breathing like a Christmas chicken, kicking her legs up frantically and squealing like a hyena on the bed. 

Then my dad asked my mum, R u coming? Mum said, Yes I'm coming, r u coming too? Dad answered:- Yes. 

They don't usually go anywhere without me so I said, wait for me, I'm coming tooo 😂

Monday, October 17, 2016

Pakistani Johnny in USA School



A Pakistani Boy took admission in an American school

Teacher : What's your name ?
Boy : Nadir Teacher
Teacher : No, new you are in America, your name is Johnny from today.

Boy went home and started a general conversation with his mother on how things turned out that day and then the name change topic pops up... 

Mother : How was the day Nadir ?
Boy :  I am American now, So please call me Johnny.

The dad over heard the conversation and the argument that followed ended up with the boy getting beaten by both the parents.

The next day he was back at school all bruised...


Teacher : what happened Johnny ??
Boy : Madam, just 6 hours after I became American, I was attacked by two Pakistani Terrorists. 

Wednesday, December 16, 2015

Little Johnny and Teacher !



Johnny was always lucky to get the sexiest looking teachers who dressed up in a revealing manner. Sadly though, they were also pretty strict on the poor little bastards. 




One day, the teacher was looking so sexy and bubbly, all students in the class were turned on...

One guy, Peter was caught smiling...

Teacher - Why are you smiling Peter?

Peter - I saw a strap of your bra

Teacher - GET OUT..... No classes for you for a week...

A while later, the teacher hears Jason go "WOW"...



Teacher - What's up Jason ?

Jason - I saw both your bra Starps..

Teacher - GET OUT... No classes for you for a month..

She was furious with the kids she turned swiftly towards the board and in the process dropped the marker pen. She bends to pick it up and little Johnny get's up from his seat with the biggest grin and starts walking away from the class. 

Teacher - Johnny, where do you think you are going ?

Johnny - With what I saw, my school days are over...  



Saturday, June 27, 2015

The Spanish Computer !



A SPANISH Teacher was explaining to her class that in Spanish, unlike English, nouns are designated as either masculine or feminine.
'House' for instance, is feminine: 'la casa.'
'Pencil,' however, is masculine: 'el lapiz.'
A student asked, 'What gender is 'computer'?'
Instead of giving the answer, the teacher split the class into two groups, male and female, and asked them to decide for themselves whether 'computer' should be a masculine or a feminine noun. Each group was asked to give 4 reasons for its recommendation.
The men's group decided that computer should definitely be of the feminine gender ('la computadora'), because:
1 No one but their creator understands their internal logic;
2 The native language they use to communicate with other computers is incomprehensible to everyone else;
3 Even the smallest mistakes are stored in long term memory for possible later retrieval; and
4 As soon as you make a commitment to one, you find yourself spending half your pay cheque on accessories for it.
The women's group, however, concluded that computers should be Masculine ('el computador'), because:
1 In order to do anything with them, you have to turn them on;
2 They have a lot of data but still can't think for themselves;
3 They are supposed to help you solve problems, but half the time they ARE the problem; and
4 As soon as you commit to one, you realize that if you had waited a little longer, you could have gotten a better model..


Tuesday, March 10, 2015

The funny Arrest !!



Math teacher arrested at JFK airport is suspected of belonging to secret terror society  !!!


A public school teacher was arrested today at John F. Kennedy International airport as he attempted to board a flight while in possession of a ruler, a protractor, a compass, an ancient wooden device called a “slide-rule” and a calculator.


At a morning press conference, Attorney General Eric Holder said he believes the man is a member of the notorious Al-Gebra movement. He did not identify the man, who has been charged by the FBI with carrying weapons of math instruction.

Al-Gebra is a problem for us,” the Attorney General said. “Al-Gebra has terrorized many young people for years. They derive solutions by means and extremes, and sometimes go off on tangents in search of absolute values. They use secret code names like ‘X’ and ‘Y’ and refer to themselves as ‘unknowns,’ but we have determined that they belong to a common denominator of the axis of medieval with coordinates in every country.”


As the Greek philosopher Isosceles used to say, “There are 3 sides to every triangle.'” When asked to comment on the arrest, President Obama said, “If God had wanted us to have better weapons of math instruction, he would have given us more fingers and toes.”


White House aides told reporters they could not recall a more intelligent or profound statement by the President.

It is believed that another Nobel Prize will follow.

Friday, June 7, 2013

Few Funnies - Short Jokes - what women think of men



 when girls agree, call, ask, care, understand, sweet, missing, interfering, possessive, love

The breathtaking view of milky way from mars


 Door Bell broken? Here is repair tips !


Policeman: " How high are you ?"
Me: "No officer. It's Hi, how are you ?"

Wednesday, June 5, 2013

Orgy at the Great Gatsby !



A teacher, during a casual conversation with one of her students, was amazed to hear that, there was an orgy scene in The Great Gatsby. But, she did not have no recollection of it. 
This is how the conversation ended.... 
Student 1 : Seriously, you don't remember that party scene when they were all together and sweaty and stuff ?
Teacher : But how could they have been having an orgy when they were all clothed?
Another Student across the table hears the conversation and decides to add his 2 cents to the topic.
Student 2 : You can have an orgy clothed...it's called a clergy.
 
 
 

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