Honey, a car has hit me out of the office. Paula brought me to the Hospital. They have been making tests and taking X-rays.
The blow to my head has been very strong, fortunately it seems that did
not cause any serious injury, but I have three broken ribs, a compound
fracture in the left leg, and they may have to amputate the right foot.
A man went to police station for filing report for his missing wife:
Man : I lost my wife (misty)
Inspector : What is her height
Man : I never noticed
Inspector : Slim or healthy
Man : Not slim, can be healthy
Inspector : Colour of eyes
Man : Never noticed
Inspector : Colour of hair
Man : Changes according to season
Inspector : What was she wearing
Man : Saree/suit/ I don’t remember exactly
Inspector : Was somebody with her ?????????
Man : Yes my Labrador dog, Romeo, tied with a golden chain, height 30 inches, healthy, blue eyes, blackish brown hair, his left foot thumb nail is slightly broken, he never barks, wearing a golden belt studded with blue balls, he likes non-veg food, we eat together, we jog together….
Wife to Husband: Do you know the meaning of W I F E?
Husband : It means, Without Information, Fighting Everytime!
Wife: No darling, it means,With Idiot For Ever
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Wife: I wish I was a newspaper, So I'd be in your hands all day.
Husband: I too wish that you were a newspaper, So I could have a new one everyday.
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Doctor: Your husband needs rest and peace. Here are some sleeping pills..
Wife: When must I give them to him?
Doctor: They are for you ________________________________________
Wife: I had to marry you to find out how stupid you are.
Husband: You should have known it the minute - I asked you to marry me.
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Husband: Today is Sunday & I have to enjoy it. So I bought 3 movie tickets.
Wife: Why Three?
Husband: For you and your parents
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Wife: What will you give me if I climb the great Mount Everest?
Husband: A lovely Push...!!!
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Q: What is the most effective way to remember your wife's birthday?
A: Just forget it once and you will never forget it again
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After a quarrel, a wife said to her husband, You know, I was a fool when I married you.. The husband replied, "Yes dear, but I was in love and didn't notice
