Joke on Poor Man by Rich Man !

A man was walking down the street when he was accosted by a particularly dirty and shabby-looking homeless man who asked him for a couple of dollars for dinner.
The man took out his wallet, extracted ten dollars and asked, "If I give you this money, will you buy some beer with it instead of dinner?"

"No, I had to stop drinking years ago," the homeless man replied.

"Will you use it to go fishing instead of buying food?" the man asked.

"No, I don't waste time fishing," the homeless man said. "I need to spend all my time trying to stay alive."

"Will you spend this on greens' fees at a golf course instead of food?" the man asked.

"Are you NUTS!" replied the homeless man. "I haven't played golf in 20 years!"

"Will you spend the money on a woman in the red light district instead of food?" the man asked.

"What disease would I get for ten lousy bucks?" exclaimed the homeless man.

"Well," said the man, "I'm not going to give you the money. Instead, I'm going to take you home for a terrific dinner cooked by my wife."

The homeless man was astounded. "Won't your wife be furious with you for doing that? I know I'm dirty and I probably smell pretty disgusting."

The man replied, "That's okay. It's important for her to see what a man looks like after he has given up beer, fishing, golf and sex."

Offensive Jokes - Politically Incorrect !

British humour- ABSOLUTELY POLITICALLY INCORRECT AND HILARIOUS

 Police in London have found a bomb outside a mosque..

They've told the public not to panic as they've managed to push it inside.
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During last night's high winds an African family were killed by a falling tree.
A spokesman for the Birmingham City council said "We didn't even know they were living up there".
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Jamaican minorities in the UK have complained that there are not enough television shows with minorities in mind, so Crimewatch is being shown 5 times a week now.
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I was reading in the paper today about this dwarf that got pick pocketed.
How could anyone stoop so low.
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I was walking down the road when I saw an Afghan bloke standing on a fifth floor
balcony shaking a carpet.
I shouted up to him, "what's up Abdul, won't it start?" 

Politically Incorrect !!

I've just come out of the shop with a meat and potato pie, large chips, mushy peas & a jumbo sausage. A poor homeless man sat there and said 'I've not eaten for two days'

I told him 'I wish I had your flamin' will power'

I took my Biology exam last Friday. I was asked to name two things commonly found in cells. Apparently "Blacks" and "Paki's" were not the correct answers.

  

In conclusion - Confucius says

• Squirrel who runs up woman's leg not find nuts
• Man who leap off cliff jump to conclusion
• Man who runs in front of car get tired, man who runs behind car get exhausted.
• War does not determine who is right, war determine who is left.